Therapy with the Judds

I recently watch an Oprah show that had Wynonna and Niomi Judd on it. The Judd's were my absolute favorite singers when I was younger. I love love love them!

Over the years they have spent many hours in therapy as their relationship has always been very strained. They shared a few of their learned communication keys that work with any relationship in your life with Oprah and I really liked what they had to say so figured I’d pass them along.

1. ‘Is this a good time for you’. Whether it’s wanting to have a discussion with someone, or simply phoning a friend to chat, being considerate of their time is important and asking if this is a good time for them shows that.

2. ‘What I hear you saying is’. I like this one as I know all too often I come out of a conversation with my husband, mom, boss or just a friend and I think I’ve understood the outcome. And so have they, yet we each have different ideas of what that outcome is. By repeating back to someone it gives you a chance to confirm that you are both on the same track.

3. ‘Do over’. I think this one is great, especially for moms. If you ever snap or react to someone quickly without thinking and don’t like your response after you’ve thought about it, ask for a do-over. Perhaps it would come with an apology, depending on how bad your reaction was.

4. ‘That doesn’t work for me’. I know we all have a tough time saying no. Either you can’t turn down someone needing you or you don’t want to sound rude. Well this is a better way to respond to someone especially if it’s followed by what does work for you. Example: “Wednesday night does not work for me. But Thursday morning works very well for me”.

I love all this ideas and am trying to implement them into my life which will hopefully increase and open the communication which will in turn create a better relationships.

Our vows

Dustin and I felt it was important to write our own vows for our wedding. Generic words just weren't going to be enough. We wanted to tell eachother how we felt, in our own words. I had mine figured out several months before the wedding and thought they were very touching and couldn't wait to say them to Dustin.

About a week before the wedding Dustin still didn't have his vows done and he was stuck! He asked for direction and I said that this was the time to tell me exactly how he feels, as it might never get said again.

Well for a guy that was having troubles, he did an amazing job. He made me a charm bracelet and his vows explained what each charm represented:

Heart – This heart represents my love for you, and I give it to you from this day forward
Key – This key represents honesty and trust, the ability for each of us to be honest with each other about anything, and the trust I hold in you with all of my dreams and fears
R – This R symbolizes respect and understanding, the respect that I have for you as a person, as a woman, and the respect we have for each other, and understanding that in times when we don’t agree we can still respect each others differences
Cross – This cross represents my faith in you, in us, and the faithfulness we will share in our lives together
Moon & Stars – These moon & stars represents guidance and our ability to lead each other through even our hardest times, and to share the direction of our lives, wherever it may take us
Leaves – Theses leaves represent our tree, growth and support, we will both continue to grow as individuals but we will also grow together, and as we grow I will support you and us in whatever life brings our way
Lock – This lock represents strength, we are stronger together than we are separately, and together we can take on any challenge that life throws our way, and I look forward to facing those challenges with you
Smiley Face – This represents your smile, there is nothing I enjoy more than seeing your smiling face, every time it makes me realize just how much I love you

WOW was all I was thinking! It was so personal, touching and simply amazing. There wasn't a dry eye there when he was done, as you can tell by the photo of me and the girls behind me doing the ugly cry.

Everyone was congratulating me on picking such an amazing man to do such a beautiful thing for our wedding. And all the guys were giving Dustin a hard time, saying he set the bar too high!

Once we got into the motorhome to tour around to take photos, Dustin gave me his wedding gift to me. It was a shadow box with his vows printed out and a spot to hang the bracelet to display it!

I am one lucky woman!!! But I knew that long before the wedding day!

The Old Married Couple

So, another Halloween has come and gone and we did our best to enjoy the most of it.

Dustin bought 2 pumpkins with good intentions of carving them.....but that didn't happen! Next year!!

We did do a little decorating this year. I clean-sweeped Canadian Tire and took advantage of a gift certificate I had from Christmas and updated my Halloween/Fall/Thanksgiving decorations. I got rid of the old and outdated decorations I had from when I first moved out when I was 18.

And....best of all this year, we got dressed up. Now last year we were fortunate enough to dress up twice. This year it was just the once, but we had a lot of fun and the costumes ended up looking great. We went to the NCC community family dance which was great to see everyone and watch the kids dance and enjoy the haunted house!

It wasn't until a few days before Halloween that I decided I was going to quite waiting for Dustin to decide what he wanted to be and went ahead with picking a costume. My initial thought was to go as an old housewife, the 1950's kind that would be in a home economics book. With a perfect dress and apron, perfect hair, and rubber gloves.

Well this idea got my wheels turning on a different type idea. So in the end, Dustin and I ended up dressing up as ourselves.....an Old Married Couple. We thought this was a great spin to take considering we've not been married for almost 2 months now!! ha ha

It was the easiest costumes. We used our own housecoats and slippers. I borrowed my grandma's curlers and scarf and I found a quick tutorial online on how to make our faces look aged. Add some glasses, coffee mugs and a newspaper for Dustin and we were set.
Some people joked that we were old Mr. and Mrs. Farr and some even went as far to say we were Lloyd and Laurangel. Guess we each can see what we have to look forward to. It'll be neat to look back on these pics and see just how true it comes.

The Proper Sneeze

Okay, so with all the viruses, germs and diseases that are flying around, threatening our livelihood, (you know the ones; the new viruses that are sure to wipe us out each year) they are teaching us to be more germ aware.

I will not lie, I am not a ‘germ-o-phobe’ so being germ conscious isn't always the first thing I think of (after all, I'll be out moving cattle, riding, and branding and then will break for lunch and probably not wash my hands).

But....I AM aware that other people are ‘germ-o-phobe’, so I try to be thoughtful of them. 'They' tell us that if we have to sneeze in public, to do so into our elbows.

MY question is.....what do you do when you are wearing short sleeves??? The other day I was trying to be conscious of my germ spreading so I sneezed into my elbow, which happened to be bare. Afterwards I realized my elbow, forearm and upper arm were all slobbery wet. So I wiped it all off with my other hand and proceeded on my way. ha ha. Realizing later that all my germs were then transferred onto my other hand and onto everything else I touched.

So, what is the proper way to sneeze with bare arms?!?!?!

Thank you

Well I was thinking about this blog post as we were driving the 4 hours out east to my cousin’s place where we celebrated thanksgiving with my mom's side of the family. As we were driving, I was checking my Facebook and reading everyone's post saying how thankful they were this weekend for their friends and family.

I decided to update my status, and I changed it to "Jody is just as thankful today as I am each and every other day'.

It got me to thinking, yes it is amazing that everyone takes a moment on Thanksgiving weekend to realize what they are thankful for. To realize what they are blessed with: health, happiness, family, friends, etc....

My challenge for you....don't be thankful just on thanksgiving. But sure to give thanks everyday for everything in your life you are grateful for. Have a extra good day, say thanks!. Arrive at your destination save and sound, give thanks! Finally get over that nasty cold that has held you hostage the last few days, give thanks! The kids only fought once today, give thanks!

The more you are thankful for, the more abundance you will draw into your life. And the best way is to start and end each day with acknowledging all the blessings in your life. Even if it is simply, thanks for the breath in my lungs!

This morning I was thankfull for:
- my headache being gone
- Dustin having a great time at the hockey game
- Friday and I'm looking forward to a quiet, productive weekend at home
- my two treatments yesterday and feeling more healthy and directed
- my health
- all the special people in my life

No more excuses

Well, it's been 4 months since my last blog entry and now that wedding planning is over and life has started to get back to normal, I no longer have an excuse for not blogging.

I have to admit, the thought of trying to update my blog during the summer amidst the wedding planning was not something I was willing to tackle. I felt like every waking moment and thought revolved around planning that day. It is a lot of work to plan a wedding. It is a lot of work to plan a wedding in 3 months. It is a lot of work to plan a wedding in 3 months in the middle of an already busy summer. I struggled a fair bit with the stress of it all and mostly did not love the process.

That is until I gave myself an attitude adjustment. It took an early morning out camping, to sit quietly by myself along a river to gain some perspective. How could all the activities leading up the most special day be CRAP! (Which were my thoughts exactly, all that planning was CRAP!). I realized that although they may not be my most favorite activities, they were all an important part to making that special day special. And I knew that it didn't matter what happened that day or leading up to it, as long as I got married, that's all that mattered!

After that 'self attitude adjustment', I was in a much better frame of mind. I took on the planning tasks with a much happier outlook. When an issue did arise, I took it in stride and dealt with it without getting stress (other than 1 issues which honestly at one point almost brought tears to my eyes and even spoke the words 'this is ruining it for me'). I swore I wouldn't be a bride that got that wrapped up in her day, but it happens. I resolved to not let those issues bring me down and to just 'let them go'. I felt much better after that! Nothing was going to wreck my special day.

Much to the stress of many (perhaps even some guests as many of them said they had their fingers crossed), we decided to get married outside. I always knew I wanted to get married outside but wasn't sure if I could handle the stress of the weather. Yet as soon as we choose our ceremony location and the decision was made, I was very calm and at peace with it all. We made a backup plan (just in case) but I never put much thought into it, somehow knowing it wouldn't be needed. I was calm and trusted the weather would be perfect. Everyone was telling me the forecast, but I never looked at it myself or stressed. I trusted the weather would be perfect. As the week went on, the forecast was getting worse, I trusted the weather would be perfect. When the wedding day arrived and that morning was cloudy and a bit windy, I trusted the day would be perfect. My dad asked me "Well, are we playing like we got it?" (which is his way of saying, are we going ahead with the ceremony being outside), I trusted the weather would be perfect.

It ended up being about 12 degrees and cloudy, with bursts of sun throughout the day. Only a bit of wind and a few spits of rain came during one part of our photos that afternoon, but all in all, the weather was perfect!!!

Well those are just a few of my wedding thoughts that ,although it is all over with now, still occupy my mind as I reminisce and relive that most special moment of my life.

Don't be surprised to hear more post wedding thoughts from me. Hopefully I can keep the blogging up to date now that I have no excuses!

Engaged!!

Okay, so I’ve had enough people ask me about the details of the engagement that I figured I’d better tell the story. Plus it’s definitely worth sharing. Dustin did an excellent job pulling it off.

So it started off earlier in the week by Dustin suggesting that we go hiking if he got a day off on the long weekend, since we wouldn’t be camping. Of course I loved the idea.

Friday after work he informed me that unfortunately, he wasn’t getting a day off. So I went about planning my weekend and was to go help friends move cattle with my dad Saturday morning and had it all lined up.

Saturday morning, 6:20am, Dustin’s alarm goes off for work. I made a comment about how crappy it was he had to get up. Then he quite excitedly announced that he didn’t have to go to work today.

I was half asleep and groggy with my eyes still shut. I think the conversation went like this:

Dustin: I don’t have to work today!
Jody: What, but you said you did.
Dustin: I was pretending.
Jody: (after a pause) Are you serious?
Dustin: Yes
Jody: You aren’t being teasy?
Dustin: No. We get to spend the day together.
Jody: But I have to go riding.
Dustin: No you don’t
Jody: Yes I do, I told dad to catch me a horse in the morning.
Dustin: I called him and told him you weren’t coming.
Jody: WHEN?
Dustin: Last night.
Jody: Really? You aren’t just being teasy?
Dustin: No! I’m seroius
Jody: Oh yay!!!
Dustin: I figured we’d go hiking!
Jody: Oh yay!

So we had a bit of a sleep in (although I didn’t sleep well after that), hit Tim Hortons, hit a few garage and were on our way. I was surprised when Dustin didn't head west for our hike, but was happy to just be along for the ride, wherever he was taking us. Next thing I know, we were south of Calgary. He has an area out there that he likes to fish at so I figured that was where we were going. Then I realized he was taking me to my uncles land SW of Nanton. Which is my most favorite place on earth!

Once that secret was out of the bag, he said he felt bad that he was sick the last time we were there and didn’t get to go for a walk. And since I’d helped him out this spring while he’s been busy, he thought this would be a good way to thank me. So needless to say I was very excited!!

Looking up to the top of Old Stormy

So we hike up ‘Old Stormy’ hill that my family usually rides up each summer. We got to the top and just looked around, chatted, ate our peanut butter and jam sandwiches and just simply enjoyed the view.

I was a little cold so he sat behind me to cuddle and warm me up. He grabbed the camera and took a picture of both of us. It must not have turned out because he went to take another one (or so I thought). He actually was taking a video. The next thing I know he whispers ‘Will you marry me’ in my ear and pops the ring in front of me!! I was so shocked! And the video shows my surprised look. It took me a second to comprehend it, then it sunk in and the water works and the ugly cry started!!


He said I took a little longer to say yes than he would have liked, ha ha

I was amazed, shocked, excited, emotional, ecstatic and overwhelmed all at once. We just sat and held each other for a bit and took in the most amazing moment in the most amazing location!!

We snapped a few more shots then decided to head back down and hit the road. We knew we needed to tell our immediate family in person and needed to do it before it hit Facebook so we were on a mission.

As we were hiking down, I was asking him all sorts of questions, about the logistics of how he pulled it off. He said he had called my parents earlier in the week to ask them for their permission, which of course they gave him. A few days later, my dad called Dustin back and said that it wasn’t his business but if he didn’t have a plan as to where he was going to propose, up in the hills would be a special place for me. My dad knows that I’ve cried up there before and that’s as close the Maker as you can get. As soon as Dustin told me what my dad had said, emotion ran over me again and I said, ‘Aw, I now have 2 special men who’ll love me forever!’.

I also told Dustin that one time I was up there I thought to myself what an awesome spot that would be to be proposed to! And boy was I right!

Every few minutes it would hit me and I’d tear up. And still do. Every time I watch the video, I tear up. I can’t describe how happy I am! I can’t wait to officially start my life with him. He’s been well worth the wait!!